Is It Just Me?

[Relentless Aaron]

I had a woman recently say to me: "I don't know if it's that you're successful, or whatever. But I'm a grown woman/40 years old. I dont need you to tell me that I'm ghetto."
And then the tears fell
"Okay. So, let me NOT judge you, and let's ask a 3rd party.Don't worry, I won't embarass you."
I waved ovecr the waitress.
"Miss. A friend of mine just acted out on his girlfrind at the movie theater, and I wanted to get a 2nd opinion. If you're watching a movie, and the date you're with answers the phone, then proceeds to TALK on the phone during the movie, is there something wrong with that?"
"That's straight up disrespectful," said the waitress with the head waggin and all."
"That's all I wanted to know." I told her.
My date said nothing.
The other thing I asked her is if she flossed.
She was stumped by the question, and couldnt even answer.
That's precisely when she came at me with the "I'm 40 years old and you're successful" comment.
Needless to say, I'm not seeing the woman, or talking to her anymore; especially after the text the next day:
"I miss you. And guess what? I flossed!"

So my question? Is it just me? Or do you EXPECT your date to floss and be on top of his/her hygiene? And the phone in the theater? Is that ghetto and disrespectful, Or just damned ghetto!? =o/

[valerie crane]

You know, some times it's not what you say but how you say it. I used to tell mother all the time. If you tell a person something in a concerned and caring voice. It makes a difference between sounding jugemental or critical. If you have not been seeing this woman long. It may have been too soon for you to make certains comments or observations concerning personal situations to her. She may already be feeling insecure due to your success. Calling her ghetto was not in tact. It sort of makes you seem uncouth. Maybe saying some thing like, that's not lady like. Would have been more appropriate. Not saying that she did not need to hear these things. I don't even know you but, I feel you have limited time to spend on any thing. You are direct not to be hurtful. Though it may have that effect on some people. You feel that grown people should take responcibility and act accordingly.I know that a friend will tell you some thing that you need to hear apposed to something that you want to hear. I think it depends on the lenght and strenght of the relationship. As far as her getting up set about the phone call. I think it was not the phone call but some thing all together different. Maybe she wanted the relationship to be more than it was. There is a way of going about getting to where you want to be in life and in relationships. Thanks

[valerie crane]

p.s. and you put her on the spot . That would have hurt my feelings and insulted me too.

[valerie crane]

I feel this topic. Is it just me. I have a question on this subject. Here it goes. Is it just me or does any one else feel that the world and life it self, Has a way of changing people with out their knowledge. I feel like just every day survival has changed me into some thing I'm not proud of. I find my self compromising my morals and character to survive. I see my self using people and manipulating them to get what I want. I play their game. I have never danced to any one's tone but my own. I don't like what I have become. Trying to fit into this society. It is easy to get caught up and I never excepted that before. My main motto used to be. I will not let the hardships of the world harden my heart. To my surprise I looked in the mirror two days ago and for the first time in a long time. I did not like the person looking back at me. Now don't get me wrong. I am not a deceitful person. I just don't like the ways that I have adopted. The Word clearly states. Be in the world but not of the world. I feel like I have felled myself and God. All in all. It is my fault for not remembering to remain humble.